Half Truths
half truths twisted
strangling your words
as lies flow
like eddies
spiraling into your
distorted reality
in your hollowed liar
of persecution
and christian values
you plot
using God
guilt and family
as a weapon
destroying those
you say you love
and blaming them
for your
destruction
2- Aphasic
on June 24 2008 - Edit · Delete
What's your reason for de-versifying Jen?
I don't know if you wrote this in 'unversed' form originally, but I suspect not, as there are capitals remaining that don't appear to belong - (Like / In) - though the 'In' line reads as though it was previously the first of a stanza. (?)
As there is no (other) punctuation, maybe you should lose the opening 'H'?
Someone help me out here - does the use of capitals (after stops) constitute an element of punctuation, or does that stuff belong in the land of ZZZs...
3- Jen
on June 25 2008 - Edit · Delete
Thanks, this is different from my usual dribble.
My reason for trying to de-versify...I like to try different styles of writing. I guess I didn't feel like writing about snots and boogers today;)
The misplaced capitals are a result of writing it centered in Microsoft Word and my carelessness. I didn't even notice them. It wasn't originally written in verse. I tried to write it just like I was talking.
4- Aphasic
on June 25 2008 - Edit · Delete
"I tried to write it just like I was talking."
That how it reads Jen - and no half-truths here, it seems :>
I'm curious - did you intend 'hollowed liar'? I previously read it as 'hollowed lair', as that's what the 'hollowed' adjective suggested (a covert campaign) - but liar is good too [poetically], a trait transformed into a whole personality/alter ego, residing in a moral void (the lair).
1- Derma Kaput
on June 24 2008 - Edit · Delete