The personal space of Colleen « poems « I am from... an ordinary snapshot «
Comment: I am from... an ordinary snapshot
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Brent's advice is gold here. I might add a bit in the near future -- but wow, that's good place to start. Usually what i say is cut 20% and see where you stand. In this case, I think Brent's spot on. Cut the 'tell' and keep the show, and see where you stand once you've done that cutting.
by Anstey on Oct. 3 2008